Obligatory first blog post, blah blah blah

I’m still ironing out the kinks in this site. Not sure if I like the theme, but I’ve played with it a bit.  Might change it to something else at some point. We shall see.

So, what is this place going to be all about?

Well, I really don’t know. I haven’t had a “public blog” in a long time. Like, years.  I kind of want to have a space to just blog whatever I feel like. I have a lot of interests. I have a lot going on in my life. There’s a lot to write about — everything from mental health to knitting, and from cooking and physical health to the crazy shit my cats do when they think we’re not paying attention (seriously, the girlcat loves to Matrix-bounce off the hallway walls from time to time, for example). Continue reading Obligatory first blog post, blah blah blah

Why is change so bloody hard?

You’d like to think that this post is about Change, capital C. Like, changing your career. Or making new friends. Or just finally making the jump from water to carbonated water because you can add those squeeze-flavour thingies to the carbonated water and it almost tastes like pop (that’s soda for my American friends).

Oh, no, no, no, no… nothing like that.

I’m talking about something really big and important.

I’m talking about something that can make or break your day.

Continue reading Why is change so bloody hard?

Dream a little dream of m–wtf was that??

So, trigger warning: I’m gonna talk about nightmares. I am a chronic nightmare sufferer and I’ve been having some doozies lately.

Last night’s nightmare, I told hubby about this morning and he was all, “You seriously need to write this stuff down. It’d make for good stories.” Uh, okay. My nightmares would make good stories. Sure.

Continue reading Dream a little dream of m–wtf was that??

Caution: Approach at own risk

It’s been almost a month and a half since my last post. Life has been busy, and I haven’t been keeping up on this part of my life. So, I’m back.

Honestly, the last week or so, my anxiety has skyrocketed. Right through the roof, in fact. This seems to happen leading up to my end-of-March birthday. I know why.

It’s the nightmares.  Continue reading Caution: Approach at own risk

Anyone get the number of that train?

There are moments in my life that give me no pride. Every time I have an anxiety attack, there is a certain amount of shame that comes with it, usually because someone has witnessed it and I’m embarrassed, or because of some sense that I should have had better control over my emotions and not let them get the better of me. I’m in my 40s. I should know better, right? Well, knowing and being able to do are two very different things.

Continue reading Anyone get the number of that train?

My idiot brain

For me, if I am sick for too long — the type that keeps you awake at night — I get “sick brain”, aka “cold brain”. Or, as I called it today, “idiot brain”. Yeah, I’ve already mentioned that I’m fighting off a cold. A collague today asked, “Oh, is that the ‘choking cough’?” He had been through this through the holiday, apparently, and was wincing in the other office in sympathy for me. He knows exactly what I’m going through.

So, today, my boss asked me to do something. I immediately hopped on it and a short time later, I told her it was done and gave it to her. A little while later, she redid the work — because apparently, I completely misunderstood what she was asking of me. Now, this doesn’t happen very often. We joke about “sharing a brain”. But my half is on medical leave right now, I guess, and I’ve got a bad temp working up there in my thought-cage, which caused me to completely mess up.

Continue reading My idiot brain

…down the rabbit hole…